Well, THAT Could Have Been A Lot Worse.

And it could have been a lot better.  But  I think it turned out exactly as it was supposed to.

As part of my recovery from quadruple bypass surgery, which was three weeks ago Tuesday, I’ve only been allowed to drive for the past few days.  And now I understand why.  Driving, like most other activities, is still pretty uncomfortable.  The place my sternum was opened and subsequently wired shut is a bit sore (it takes awhile for that to knit itself back together), my back usually hurts a bit for some reason, and the thing that really drives me nuts is the area immediately surrounding my foot-long chest incision.  My shirt rubs against it and chafes constantly. It doesn’t hurt, it just chafes.  And  the fact that I was pretty much shaved from my neck southward for the surgery, and the foliage is just now growing back, that’s irritating as hell too.

I’m doing the best I can to maintain  a sunny disposish, though. I think, mostly successfully.

Today, though, I drove to the grocery store on my own.  Tammy feels as though she’s coming down with a cold, so I figured I’d go out and get us a little supper.  It was raining, and the bottoms of my shoes were wet.  I was walking across the floor toward the bread, when I went down.  Suddenly, and pretty hard.  I must have exclaimed something on the way down, because  several other shoppers dropped what they were doing, and ran over immediately.

“Sir, are you okay???”  they said.  I’m still not used to being called “sir,” but, well, we’re in the South, and I was considerably older than they were.  I took awhile to do an inspection, sitting on the floor, and I was okay.  A scraped up knee, yes.  but the breastbone wires held, the incision held, and I was pretty much okay.

Now, I’m not proud of this, but I guess it’s not too out of line, considering the fact that we’re still unemployed and now owe somewhere near a gazillion dollars in medical bills.  But no sooner had I hit the floor, than I thought, “Hey!  This could be my lucky day!  Lawsuit!  Settle out of court!  We’re set!!!!”  I mean, you hear of all these folks who will put a grape down on the floor in the produce section, intentionally slip on it…. it would be so easy!  I mean, I really did fall accidentally… I just had heart surgery… Wow.

But just as quickly, that pesky little angel that was sitting on my other shoulder intervened.  What’s that thing called?  Oh yeah.  Conscience.  There’s no way in the world I could go through with something like that.  Ever.  I fell because, well, stuff happens.  I’m not hurt, and even if I had been, it wouldn’t have been Harris-Teeter’s fault.   So I just couldn’t do it.

And despite the fact that we could have easily cleaned up, and solved most of our financial problems, Tammy couldn’t have done it either.

I’m a little disappointed that it even occurred to me.

But things are going pretty well, all things considered.  I’m trying to stick with the more hearth-healthy stuff, and toward that end, made a loaf of multi-grain bread this week.  It smelled great as it baked in my Sunbeam bread machine.  But when it came out it looked more like a tumor than a loaf of bread.  It tasted okay if it was sliced thin, toasted, and covered with a lot of Smart Balance.  But I’d rather have a loaf of bread that looks more like a loaf of bread and less like something that should be surgically removed.

If you have a good recipe for a nice, multi-grain bread for a bread machine, and would like to share it, I’d love to try it….


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